Letter to the McCullough principal

I wrote the following letter to the McCullough principal. Unsurprisingly, it had no impact. Nevertheless, it's probably worth republishing here.


"I have been advised that Michelle Foldetta has chosen to resign as the Highland Girls director after the administration chose not to back her in a disciplinary incident involving a student. I cannot help but think that if you choose this path, abrogating both the disciplinary process and individual responsibility, and accept the resignation of Ms. Foldetta, McCullough will be less for it. Here’s why:

I have a shirt hanging in my closet. It’s a work shirt that I had embroidered to say “Highland Girl Dad.” Although I ostensibly had it made to support the daughter at her events when she was a Highland Girl, I always liked the shirt because it spoke of something larger, and I really felt a connection to the program.

Back then, I joked in the family’s Christmas letter about the girls being lectured by Ms. Foldetta as they stretched, on not hugging boys in the hall, on which was the proper fork to use in what situation etc. I mused that perhaps the practice was widespread, that there would be an entire generation of Jr. High school athletes who all learned proper etiquette as they stretched, and could always remember the correct fork. A friend of the daughter who ran track, upon reading that passage in the letter, looked up and said “No, not so much.” Too bad for the track team.

If you have watched the Highland Girls, and by extension the Highsteppers, you know that the style of dance they pursue is exacting, rigorous, and precise. It emphasizes unity and strength over flash. It is old-school. The style is born of tradition, but also embodied in the directors of both squads. To have these high expectations and standards of behavior during such a chaotic time of life as Jr. High school was absolutely golden for the daughter. She will always be, in some sense, a Highland Girl, and that is a direct reflection of the work of Ms. Foldetta.

This is the bottom line for me: the only teachers, coaches, and mentors who ever contributed to my development in any area were the ones who expected something from me, and held me to a standard. Not everybody chooses to exercise the discretion they are given in order to fulfill a vision of what others can be. I remember the professor who called me out for a lack of intellectual rigor and care far more than the many who told me I was doing great, mainly because he was invested enough in my development as a graduate student to do so.

We seem to live in an era in which uniqueness and specialness is valued less and less. Highland Girls, under the direction of Ms. Foldetta, is one of the things that makes McCullough special. I’m sure that you will always have a drill team of one sort or another, whoever the director may be. Without Ms. Foldetta, however, the Highland Girls will not have the potential to make such an impact on the girls’ lives at such a crucial time."